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If you’ve had the distinct privilege of spending any amount of time with me you know by now that I’m an opinionated guy What’s you’ve realized that I often present my opinions as fact What better way to cement these opinions as such than to remove them from the malleable medium of a blog and print them indelibly in this digital volume? If you read it in an ebook you know it’s trueIt is my intent that this book reads as a collection of short stories Creative nonfiction as the Library Of Congress might call it As a result you’ll find references to events in the past interspersed with rants and tangents rantgents about things that I currently hate or at least somewhat convincingly pretend to hate You might even find a few chapters about things I don’t hate I have adapted a couple of the chapters in this book from my blog Rhetorock which you can and will follow at jondavidsonmusicblogspotcom However I’ve removed any sense of chronological order My mind rarely sits still Metaphorically Physically it’s typically firmly lodged inside my skull Right now I’m simultaneously thinking about bath salts kidney beans Levi’s 510s Jeremiah Obamacare Keane and why I put my underwear on inside out again Rather than attempt to tame the meandering beast that is my stream of consciousness I’ve written in a way that reflects my usual thought processes You’re welcomeOpinions represented in this book are solely mine although I suppose that probably goes without saying Some opinions have changed since I’ve written certain chapters I’ve completely fabricated some opinions for the sake of discussion and entertainment and to try to make others look stupid However some of the opinions I’ve expressed are completely serious Feel free to disagree with me on anything and everything Use your judgment and take everything I’ve penned with a grain of salt Better yet with a massive salt lick Make sure it’s iodized salt though Goiters are really not all that coolIf you’re offended by anything that I’ve written I sincerely apologize You have taken me way too seriously Write me an angry letter and then take that letter and light it on fireIt is my hope that this book makes you laugh cry and ponder Simultaneously you big thoughtful blubbering messLife is short and we’re not given a lot of time on this earth I hope you enjoy the time you spend with this book

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